The Adventures of Redneck Cop Vol1
by tannermwhitaker
Summary: This is a mature rated story so viewer discretion is advised
1. Chapter 1

_The Adventures of Redneck Cop and Boye_

Chapter

1

Earl (Redneck Cop) pulls up to Trevor Phillip's (Other Redneck) trailer. If you can call it a trailer. "Stay here Boye (Name Unknown to Humanity) There is nobody here except Ronald Weasley (Guy Who Likes The Radio) "We has a reason to expect that you has been drinking the mariejewana" say Earl. "No idea what you just said or what your talking about. But Mr Trevor is not doing anything bad" says Ronald McDonald. Earl eyed Ronald Raegen and belives the story instantly. Then he hits Ronald Mcassface with a nightstick. "We be gitten out here you hear Boye?" They pull away from the establishment and jump their police car over a run down motel.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter

2

Earl and Boye stop at a liquor store to get liquor and they walk in. No one is at the counter to sell them alcohol. Earl sniff the air and says "Just wait a dem dare dog dang dee doo saw diddy doody second! This smell like my moma's house!" He and Boye walk up a stairway behind the counter. OH MY SWEET WHITE JESUS! THIS HERE IS ONE DEM DERE METH LABERTORITIES!" Earl exclaims. "Hey Boye? You wanna see wut happins if I sheet it? HURHURHUR!" Earl asks. BANG! Earl shoots it. "See dere Boye nuthin happ..." The room explodes and they flew out a window. Earl gets up and sees a G-string lying on the ground. He sniffs them and instantly know whos stench it is. "It's Ramey!" he says. The drive in a hurry to a other liquor store and sees the cop standing there with a stomach as big as a Titan (A very Sexy Cargo Jet) "Harlow dere Ramey." She sees him and says in the voice of a 46 year old smoker "You got me Pregernant you bastard!" Earl shoots her with a Tazer (A very Sexy Stun Gun) After a couple kegs of Blaine County's finest liquor the crew rode to Trevor's house and beat the shit out of Ronald Cuntlover with nightsticks.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter

3

Now all you people wondering about how all this here stuff began? Well this chapter isn't going to tell you so fuck off. Now the ones who don't give a single fuck about themselves in the world you may read on. One day Earl and Boye was walking at the beach and saw some people killing other people and Earl said "WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS DOING?!" The men replied in a voice that sounded like a squeaky dying rabbit being anally raped. "We just playing online" said the first Child-Man. Then they shot at him and missed every time. Earl shot back and they all started yelling things like "HAKUR" "MOM! THEYRE KILLING ME AGAIN" and "STOOOOOPPPP". So Earl beat the shit out of them and said "Cum on Boye" Then the beat the shit out of Ronald again.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter

4

After about three days of waiting in Earl's police car outside of a "completely legal" brothel, Boye gets hooked on a type of music know as rap. Rap is were people who had bad lives or are black sing fast poetry about their bad lives or about being black. Some well know rappers are BlueJayZ, M&Ms Cleveland Brown. Well Earl came back to the car "Completely Sober" and heard the music. "Turn off dat dem der Nigerian music. Exept he didn't say Nigerian. Boye started to cry and shat his pants a little. Earl said he was just investigating to see if the brothel had prostitution and he blew it up.

And then they beat the shit out of Ronald. Then the killed all of the rappers who were "Nigerian".


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter

5

One day Boye and Earl was sitting at the "police station" far away from a "Liquor Store" then someone buzzed the radio. "There is a robbery at Blaine County Bank everyone on duty please hurry to the" BANG! "Nice shot T!". They "hurried" away from the "police station". When they got there there was three people in ballistic armor and miniguns, they saw Earl and Boye and shit their car. Earl was like "what the fuck is wrong with you motherfucking idiots!" So he noticed there was a black guy with them so he shot him in the face and he died instantly. Then he kill the white prick and raped and shot a redneck for not being as country as he is. Earl noticed something about the semen covered redneck and it was Trevor Phillips! The case from chapter 1 was solved!


End file.
